Tuesday, July 27, 2010

I had a suspicion

So the other day I read this article on http://www.hotair.com/, which is one of my favorite websites. It's an article from the NY Daily News Rom-Coms and Relationships . One of my many theories in why male-female relationships are so difficult. In our quest for instant gratification, it's now overlapping into the expectation of instant happiness! Are we insane? Or are we just falling for crap because it's easier than examining ourselves? I look at what these movies tell us: That we will meet a hot guy out of no where who is a total player but gives it all up when he meets us (ok, yes we know we are all fabulous already but play along please), there are a couple bumps in the road and after one mishap (maybe after the 2nd or 3rd date) they realize they looooooooove us. However, it freaks them out and they dump us. We cry. They come crawling back. We accept and poof! Happily ever after. They plan surprises, they plan ahead (HA!!!!), never do things that make us question their loyalties, and of course are fabulous lovers who get it right every time.
When in reality they just keep seeing the other girls, make weird excuses to us and keep coming around for God only knows what reason.
I will confess I stopped reading Cosmo about a year ago. I couldn't do it anymore. The vapid commentary and articles on how to get into a guy's head and make him fall for you were ridiculous. I prefer a much simpler way, as related to me by a male friend a couple days ago: Give him oral then make him a sandwich. With cheese.
No undertones there! No double speak or mixed messages. Am I trading my youthful hopefulness for the cynicism of my mid-30's? I don't think so. I think I'm starting to prefer not to care about "but what does it mean?!" I think I'm becoming a better listener. No more projecting what I want it to mean and hearing what it actually is. It's definitely freed my brain up to pursue more fun things.. like reading, planning my trips and playing WoW. (hahahaha...j/k..... or maybe not?)

2 comments:

weezermonkey said...

The cheese is the key part of the sandwich. Totally.

On a similar note, when I polled my friends about whether I should keep my hair long or go for a bob or lob, most of the girls said bob.

My guy friends said, "Bobs are for old Cantonese moms I don't want to *#$%!"

I'm keeping my hair long.

Anonymous said...

hahaahhahahaha, love your post weezermonkey!

But on a serious note about what Chrystal posted: I don't think you are becoming a cynic, lord help me if you are, because then I am on the same boat.
I am just tired of the constant mind fucking from guys that will never grow up, and are perpetually enabled by women whom, for whatever reason, accept this behavior.
It's a vicious cycle. HOw do we not get caught in this riptide?