The 5th century Chinese general, Sun Tzu, was a genius in studying his adversaries. He knew every move they made and why. His advice and teachings are so well thought out, that to this day his writing, "The Art of War", is on the Marine Corps leadership reading list and assigned reading material at the American War College.
These days I feel like I'm in an exhausting battle to find love. My dating experiences lately have left me feeling like a fighter pilot after a dogfight, and I'm not quite sure who won. I've lost my fighting form, and I need to get it back. I've completely misunderstood and under/overestimated the adversary, leading to outcomes that are highly disappointing.
I've kept my promise for another week, of letting my match.com subscription go another week. I've officially exhausted all the dates the I had from the last go round. I've still retained my title of "one-date wonder". I'm going to experiment with a different approach. Twice in the past week, two different men told me that I'm intimidating because I'm confident. I'm not arrogant on my dates. I give them all the time they want to talk about themselves, ask good questions. However, it seems my "confidence" keeps peeking through. I've been told I scare the hell out of men. So, I'm going to do the unthinkable and pretend to be dumb. Red has already thrown the gauntlet, asking me how will I find someone who wants me for me if I'm not acting like me? Well, since my normal way of doing things isn't working, I'll try something else.
I'm also thinking of turning down men if they ask me out. Maybe I'm not in a place to date. Which makes me really f-ing angry. It's been over a year since Satan dumped me. Why the hell am I'm not in a place to be happy? Why am I still angry? hmmmm.... maybe next Saturday I will go to confession and lay all this psychological b.s. on the priest. It couldn't hurt. Maybe it will help center me.
=)
1 comment:
I think I would still be angry, too. I think that is normal! Well, at least for us smart chicks.
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