And the dead hath arisen...

You know, there comes a time when you think you've gotten over someone and the universe decides to test you, just to make sure. Lately for me this has come in the form of some disturbing dreams about Satan. In the first one, we were getting married but I got the distinct sense that it was rushed. Not a whole lot of people showed up. Even though the groom was there, and so was my dress, the hair and make up people showed up waaaay late, thereby ensuring the wedding wouldn't happen. In the second one, which occurred last night, there was some type of natural catastrophe and I went to his house (he conveniently lived in Long Beach in the dream, how nice!) and told him exactly what I thought of him and his Hail-Mary-baby-having-cheating-slut-ex girlfriend-that he married. In the dream I felt very vindicated. When I woke up, I felt mildly nauseated. I told my sister and she said, "EWW! You SHOULD be disturbed!" I think she's right.
I wasn't the only one who was tested this week. Red recently came to terms with the fact that she's over Snitch. It took a lot of soul searching, which all we go through after a break up. We come to take responsibility for our part in a relationship. The universe, however, had other ideas. Today it reared it's ugly head in the form of a posting by Snitch on this very blog (which I promptly deleted, because it was just entirely too ridiculous and full of convenient lies). For those of you who need a refresher, cruise down a few posts (in August) and read "How to make break-ups extra crappy", where I have an open letter to him entitled, "Dear Ass Hat". None of what he said matters, because Red is over it. She's doing great right now. And even though Snitch told her his life is so grand now, it makes one wonder why, a whole 5 months later, he felt the need to opine on a post he literally had to dig for. Hmmm....
As for the rest of his comments about my personal experiences, that's exactly what my blog is about. So others, along with myself, can comment on my mistakes. If he bothered to read the most current postings, he would see I had somewhat of a realization. Evolving must not be something he recognizes, however, since he's already perfect! So, my advice still stands: Stay single Snitch/Ass Hat. Most woman don't care what you have, you're still an asshole. No one will ever be to your standards because on the inside you don't like YOURSELF or what you want. This is not the female population's problem, so do us all a favor and go take a hike. And don't come back.
The End

The Epiphany

No, this isn't going to be a blog piece on the Catholic feast day that just passed. This is my personal epiphany, lower case.
About two weeks ago, I was bitching to Red how my dating life is crap. Seriously, no one really calling, can't get past the first date, etc. She made this crazy suggestion of having me give her the numbers of the last 5 guys I went out with so she could call them and see what happened. WTF?! Obviously I said no, but then she told me about this book where the author did just that. "Why He Didn't Call Back"  At first I resisted. Red is big on self-help books, and I'm so not. The last thing I felt I needed was chicks boo-hooing in a book, with wishful thinking suggestions like, "maybe he was busy", "I'm sure there's a perfectly reasonable explanation" and "stop thinking about him and he will call". Yeah. How many times have we forced ourselves to believe that crap?
But that's SO not what the book was about. I bought it on my Kindle for Android and read it in 3 days. This woman did exit interviews with 1000 men who never called women back after a first date. OMG. I had NO idea I was screwing up so badly.
She breaks it up by things we do ON first dates that turn men off, and things we do AFTER the date that turn men off. It's never just one thing, but rather a bunch of these little things. And once they see one thing that doesn't sit well, they start looking for other things to verify that opinion. They are very good at filtering out, rather than giving us the benefit of the doubt which women do a lot more often. I am guilty of a couple of behaviors in this books, but I don't really belong totally to any of the categories. I exhibit some things out the sections Boss Lady, The Closer and Sadie Hawkins. Seriously, read it and you will get it.
After reading this book, I feel like I literally had an epiphany about love and dating. I feel more hopeful and happy than I have in a looooong time. I encourage all single women to read this book. Things that women see as perfectly reasonable are things that men do not see the same way. I know now what NOT to do. Maybe I will be going out on a lot more dates. Maybe this year I will fall in love.
We shall see!

A New Year, A New Beginning

So last night while I was dancing the night away with my sister and some friends, I began to think of what I wanted for myself for the new year. Not necessarily a resolution that I will end up flunking out on, but just some things I would like to have happen. 

1. I have a lot of do-overs to do in 2011: I need to make up for dumb ass memories from last year, which began with NYE. Last year I spent it with someone I had feelings for, who ended up kicking me to the curb. This time I partied it up with my sister, some friends, and made out with a cute guy at midnight. Woot! So now I need to cover V-day, Memorial Day weekend, etc. Get the idea? Labor Day weekend is already covered because I will be leaving for Greece on Labor Day. I want to make new memories with my friends only, and not some stupid guy that won't be around a month after.

2. I would like to fall in love again: Truly. It's been a couple years since I felt that heady rush of hormones. But falling in love is too easy. Having it be MUTUAL is actually what I'm after. Yeah, I know this is a tall order so that's why its not a resolution. Just a wish on the list.

3. Not get wait listed for school: Ok this might be tough, considering the price in universities lately has caused an influx of students in JC's, giving me a problem trying to get my frigging math requirement completed. But I'm going to try anyway. 

4. Try out some positivity: Yep, maybe being such a cranky bitch isn't good for my health, but its so comfortable! Starting Monday, Boy Wonder and I will be on a gym and diet plan. I would like to get back down to my "fighting" weight, but its not a resolution. I just want to make it a part of my life and having a sidekick to make me feel guilty when I flake might be exactly what I need.

And finally, give thanks for all that I have: my health, my family, my pets, my friends, my job, my awesome co-workers who have made my job so fun, and Sunday mornings at Gallagher's for football. 

So here I say, "Slàinte mhòr" (to health and life in Scottish Gaelic), and wish everyone much happiness in the New Year!